Kieran Enjoys His Yoghurt
The lovely Kieran – butter wouldn’t melt in his mouth but ice cream would

One day the MLB and his father had to find an alternative way to get to school, due to a malfunctioning motor vehicle. The father being the wise man that he wasn’t, pinpointed the bus the night before on his surprisingly up to date timetable. The father told the MLB that the bus would pick the two of them up at Sir Thomas Mitchell Drive at 8.32 a.m. There was no doubt in the father’s mind about this Thomas being the pick up point.

Father and MLB stood twenty metres away from the bus stop to avoid the burning sun. The father stood in the shade of a withering bottlebrush and the MLB stood in the shade of his father, standing in the shade of the bottlebrush. When the bus had not appeared by 8.42 a.m. the Ruth, married to the man with a lawnmower welded to his arms, arrived. “Would you like a lift anywhere ?” she said. The father said “No but my wife would like one under her bottom“. After the little bit of banter, father and MLB got into the car. MLB legs, arms, school bag and recently polished Clarks shoes flailing wildly, climbed over the baby seat in the back of the car. Fortunately baby was not on board.

The Ruth said she was going to Forestville which was in the opposite direction, so father and MLB left her company at Forest Way in the hope of sponging another lift. The father approached a young teenage girl standing on the corner watching all the cars going by. “Is this a bus stop?” asked the father with the beads of sweat on his face obviously causing some consternation within the mind of the young girl. When she finally composed herself and looked down at the beautiful blonde boy, she realised that he could not be in the custody of a paedophile. “Yes” she replied.

Although it was a bus stop, the next bus that arrived did not stop at the stop but went around the corner. The father grabbed the bag of the MLB, to which the MLB was attached and hurried after the bus. The driver opened the door as the MLB searched in vain for his new bus pass. MLB was bitterly disappointed that after waiting so long for his pass, he would not get to use it. He was determined to ensure that his mother’s efforts to obtain his bus pass would not be in vain. Five minutes elapsed with the driver saying 43 times “don’t worry about it”. Finally MLB produced the document smothered in Cottees strawberry jam and squashed sandwich remains and held it proudly aloft.

The father saw the beautiful little one get on the bus, praying to Jesus, Mary and Joseph that the very patient bus driver would carry him safely to The Belrose Public School. The father was by now saturated in sweat and carried on his way to meet the $30 million dollar client. The beautiful little MLB arrived safely at school on time.

P.S. The father declared that this was the most humid day of all time and that the “MLB” (Miserable Little Bastard) was really not so.

To Kieran

With love 

Dad x


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